The Girl On the Train - directed by Tate Taylor
'Based on the novel that shocked the world' screams the tagline on the poster for this movie.
Not having read the book I cannot comment on the validity of that claim but having just seen the film I can say that 'shock' is definitely the word I would use to describe my experience in the cinema.
I am genuinely shocked that a movie that combines the talents of Emily Blunt, Rebecca Ferguson and rapidly rising star Haley Bennett could be as dull, predictable, cliched and un-engaging as this one.
And worse - there are more than a few moments designed to elicit gasps and produce white knuckled tension that serve only to generate titters of derision.
Here's an early example of a line intended to be powerful - 'She loved you.... in a way that most people only dream of'.
Blunt delivers this line and her delivery is as good as you would hope - she is a damned fine actress after all.
But what talent could possibly compete with the Mills & Boon level writing that created such a dull, overwrought line?
And worse still- the line doesn't ring true for the character speaking it or for the character about whom it is spoken.
And that is merely the start of the issues with this film.
Emily Blunt's Rachel takes a train to the city and back each day.
She gazes out of the window and cannot wait until her gaze falls upon one house in particular.
In this house lives a free spirited young woman who seems to be happily married and living the perfect life.
Rachel is an alcoholic who has split from her husband who has moved on to marry a woman who could give him the child that Rachel was unable to.
Her life is far from ideal.
Of course it is soon revealed that the lovely young woman with the perfect life has no such thing either.
Haley Bennett's Megan Hipwell may be stunningly beautiful but she is undergoing counseling with a psychiatrist with whom she flirts outrageously even as she tell tales of how unhappy she is with a husband who constantly harangues her to give him a child.
And these two men are far from the only ones in her life.
We spend time bouncing between the travails of Rachel and Megan back and forth over a few months leading up the point at which the latter disappears.
The beautiful Blunt de-glams here in portraying the alcoholic mess that Rachel is and for all but a scant few minutes I couldn't have cared less for her character.
She comes off as a pain the butt.
Even worse is the cold, promiscuous Megan who has a joyless existence as a nanny to Rachel's ex-husband's new wife and child up until she quits with less than 24 hours notice because hey - she is a free spirit.
Each of the three women have histories that will be revealed as the film goes on but not a one of them manages to generate any sympathy even when this happens.
The shadow of David Fincher's great thriller "Gone Girl" looms large over this film.
There is no avoiding comparisons.
Not only is there a lot of common ground in the subject matter- that of a beautiful, supposedly happily married young woman who goes missing, but visually too the two films appear cut from the same cloth.
Or at least "The Girl On the Train" tries to be.
Aside from a few nicely executed shots with shome good depth of field it is a bland affair - specially when compared to the lush, gorgeousness of Fincher's typically stunning film.
Don't get me wrong - "Gone Girl" is a lurid, potboiler of a tale just like "The Girl On the Train"
But whereas Fincher's film rises above its pulpy source material courtesy of immaculate pacing, superb editing and a script by the author of that very same source novel Tate Taylor's film takes what is allegedly a damned good read and turns it into a tale of shallow, deeply damaged people doing things we don't care about to people we care even less about.
Each male character is controlling and manipulative and every female one riddled with psychological issues.
The tagline should have been 'Men are Pricks, Bitches Be Crazy'.
Characters do ridiculous things and I laughed far too often during moments that I should have been glued to the screen desperately waiting to see what was going to happen next.
One scene has Rachel recalling stealing her ex-husband's new baby.
Thinking better of it when she is caught she places the infant on the ground and runs off through long grass.
Blunt's unusual arm flailing run as she does so is hilarious.
Another moment sees one character standing motionless and blank faced as another is about to be murdered.
I would love to describe in more detail how wrong this scene is but fear of spoilers prevents me from hacking into the awfulness to the degree that I wish I could.
I hate to constantly compare this film to "Gone Girl" but I can think of no better way to explain what doesn't work in this film than in doing so one more time.
There is a moment during "Gone Girl" where one of its big surprises is revealed where I sat forward in my seat.
That isn't a figure of speech - I literally moved myself to the edge of my seat with a "Whaaaaat?!" look on my face.
It was a moment of absolute delight in being taken on a joyful ride conducted by a master of the thriller genre.
With "The Girl On the Train" I shifted in my seat but it was sideways and slouching and straightening with frustration and impatience as three of the best actresses in the business were utterly wasted playing bonkers characters doing things I had no interest in.
The only vaguely fascinating thing for me was watching Blunt's attractiveness increase as a device for showing where the audience's sympathy should be for her and in marvelling at how naked Bennett was without actually showing anything that qualifies as nudity.
I feel sorry for both she and Blunt to be utilised in such a wasteful manner.
In fact the only people to come out of this shambles with any semblence of dignity intact are the ever reliable Allison Janney as an undewritten police detective and Rebecca Ferguson as Anna - Rachel's ex-husbands new wife.
Even they are very, very close to the edge though such is the awfulness of the characters they are playing and the dialogue that they are required to deliver.
If you don't see the ending coming from about ten minutes in you obviously don't watch many movies.
Don't expect to be at all surprised by anything in this film beyond how bad it is.
This is a startlingly dull film about startlingly shallow, ugly people doing ugly things that I didn't care one iota about.
Given the talent involved I am almost impressed by this feat.
RATING: 56 / 100
CONCLUSION: A mess of a film. Predictable and filled with some truly dire dialogue it completely lacks thrills or mystery. A very pale imitation of the far, far better "Gone Girl" this draws giggles and groans in place of gasps and glee.
Starring: Emily Blunt, Haley Bennett, Justin Theroux, Allison Janney, Rebecca Ferguson, Luke Evans, Edgar Ramirez, Laura Prepon, Lisa Kudrow, Darren Goldstein, Mac Tavares
Screenplay: Erin Cressida Wilson (based on the novel by Paula Hawkins)
Music Score by: Danny Elfman
Cinematography: Charlotte Bruus Christensen
Cinematography: Charlotte Bruus Christensen
Edited by: Andrew Buckland & Michael McCusker
Running Time: 112 minutes
Language: English
Rated: R16 - Violence, profanity, sex scenes
Running Time: 112 minutes
Language: English
Rated: R16 - Violence, profanity, sex scenes
'Based on the novel that shocked the world' screams the tagline on the poster for this movie.
Not having read the book I cannot comment on the validity of that claim but having just seen the film I can say that 'shock' is definitely the word I would use to describe my experience in the cinema.
I am genuinely shocked that a movie that combines the talents of Emily Blunt, Rebecca Ferguson and rapidly rising star Haley Bennett could be as dull, predictable, cliched and un-engaging as this one.
And worse - there are more than a few moments designed to elicit gasps and produce white knuckled tension that serve only to generate titters of derision.
Here's an early example of a line intended to be powerful - 'She loved you.... in a way that most people only dream of'.
Blunt delivers this line and her delivery is as good as you would hope - she is a damned fine actress after all.
But what talent could possibly compete with the Mills & Boon level writing that created such a dull, overwrought line?
And worse still- the line doesn't ring true for the character speaking it or for the character about whom it is spoken.
And that is merely the start of the issues with this film.
 |
| Emily Blunt, Haley Bennett and Rebecca Ferguson |
She gazes out of the window and cannot wait until her gaze falls upon one house in particular.
In this house lives a free spirited young woman who seems to be happily married and living the perfect life.
Rachel is an alcoholic who has split from her husband who has moved on to marry a woman who could give him the child that Rachel was unable to.
Her life is far from ideal.
Of course it is soon revealed that the lovely young woman with the perfect life has no such thing either.
Haley Bennett's Megan Hipwell may be stunningly beautiful but she is undergoing counseling with a psychiatrist with whom she flirts outrageously even as she tell tales of how unhappy she is with a husband who constantly harangues her to give him a child.
And these two men are far from the only ones in her life.
We spend time bouncing between the travails of Rachel and Megan back and forth over a few months leading up the point at which the latter disappears.
The beautiful Blunt de-glams here in portraying the alcoholic mess that Rachel is and for all but a scant few minutes I couldn't have cared less for her character.
She comes off as a pain the butt.
Even worse is the cold, promiscuous Megan who has a joyless existence as a nanny to Rachel's ex-husband's new wife and child up until she quits with less than 24 hours notice because hey - she is a free spirit.
Each of the three women have histories that will be revealed as the film goes on but not a one of them manages to generate any sympathy even when this happens.
The shadow of David Fincher's great thriller "Gone Girl" looms large over this film.
There is no avoiding comparisons.
Not only is there a lot of common ground in the subject matter- that of a beautiful, supposedly happily married young woman who goes missing, but visually too the two films appear cut from the same cloth.
Or at least "The Girl On the Train" tries to be.
Aside from a few nicely executed shots with shome good depth of field it is a bland affair - specially when compared to the lush, gorgeousness of Fincher's typically stunning film.
Don't get me wrong - "Gone Girl" is a lurid, potboiler of a tale just like "The Girl On the Train"
But whereas Fincher's film rises above its pulpy source material courtesy of immaculate pacing, superb editing and a script by the author of that very same source novel Tate Taylor's film takes what is allegedly a damned good read and turns it into a tale of shallow, deeply damaged people doing things we don't care about to people we care even less about.
Each male character is controlling and manipulative and every female one riddled with psychological issues.
The tagline should have been 'Men are Pricks, Bitches Be Crazy'.
Characters do ridiculous things and I laughed far too often during moments that I should have been glued to the screen desperately waiting to see what was going to happen next.
One scene has Rachel recalling stealing her ex-husband's new baby.
Thinking better of it when she is caught she places the infant on the ground and runs off through long grass.
Blunt's unusual arm flailing run as she does so is hilarious.
Another moment sees one character standing motionless and blank faced as another is about to be murdered.
I would love to describe in more detail how wrong this scene is but fear of spoilers prevents me from hacking into the awfulness to the degree that I wish I could.
 |
| Justin Theroux, Luke Evans and far right- Theroux and Rebecca Ferguson |
There is a moment during "Gone Girl" where one of its big surprises is revealed where I sat forward in my seat.
That isn't a figure of speech - I literally moved myself to the edge of my seat with a "Whaaaaat?!" look on my face.
It was a moment of absolute delight in being taken on a joyful ride conducted by a master of the thriller genre.
With "The Girl On the Train" I shifted in my seat but it was sideways and slouching and straightening with frustration and impatience as three of the best actresses in the business were utterly wasted playing bonkers characters doing things I had no interest in.
The only vaguely fascinating thing for me was watching Blunt's attractiveness increase as a device for showing where the audience's sympathy should be for her and in marvelling at how naked Bennett was without actually showing anything that qualifies as nudity.
I feel sorry for both she and Blunt to be utilised in such a wasteful manner.
In fact the only people to come out of this shambles with any semblence of dignity intact are the ever reliable Allison Janney as an undewritten police detective and Rebecca Ferguson as Anna - Rachel's ex-husbands new wife.
Even they are very, very close to the edge though such is the awfulness of the characters they are playing and the dialogue that they are required to deliver.
If you don't see the ending coming from about ten minutes in you obviously don't watch many movies.
Don't expect to be at all surprised by anything in this film beyond how bad it is.
This is a startlingly dull film about startlingly shallow, ugly people doing ugly things that I didn't care one iota about.
Given the talent involved I am almost impressed by this feat.
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